Attending public school is by no means an optimal modality toward the achievement of academic greatness. In fact, it could very well be argued that being subjected to the diluted heuristic of a public education will likely preclude academic success. However, aside from its many deficiencies, there is but one benefit to having a learning experience that is dictated by the government-that of proper social adjustment via interaction with one's peer cohort. Adolescence is a tumultuous time period for everyone's personal development. As such, being exposed to all of the corrective feedback and negative influence of one's peers is a crucial ingredient toward forging a normal, well-balanced individual during this important period of growth and change. And there is no better place to experience the full spectrum of adolescent value systems than within the confines of compulsory education. There are, of course, exceptions to this rule, as a significant proportion of children never have a chance at becoming properly socially adjusted whether or not they are forced to interact with the vast diversity of their peers. Keaton Albertson was one such child. Throughout the course of his academic career, Keaton never fit in. He was not Mormon enough to get along with the religious children at school and he was too square to fully integrate into the radical milieu of college life outside of the Beehive State. To make matters worse, he was a ginger-haired introvert who was more fascinated with bugs than with sports, which is definitely not a good combination of traits to become a cool kid in any setting. Join Keaton on his literary journey through the dredges of the Utah public school system to the heights of the Ivy League and discover the social challenges and life opportunities found along the way.